Saturday, October 8, 2011

This and That

It's really amazing how your Saturday night can start looking up with just a little win by your football team.  We played Tech tonight and barely scraped out a win.  We tried to give it to them, but ended up winning, and honestly, it feels good.  I would suggest a celebratory trip to Applebees for half price appetizers and drinks, but we did that last night....

Because our game was a night game, we decided to order a pizza so I didn't have to be up cooking and miss a lot of the game.  Also, we're pretty superstitious, and I wouldn't want to be up moving around during the game.  It's very important to stay still so you don't mess up the mojo.  So I ordered a pizza from Pizza Hut and left at half time to pick it up.  I'm not sure if I've addressed the situation of our Pizza Hut on the blog before but, it's shady to say the least.  Honestly, I was a little disturbed when I noticed that there was a rat trap by the front entrance that said "POISON TO HUMANS."  THEN MAYBE DON'T PUT IT SO CLOSE TO THE PEOPLE FOOD, CLOWNS.  The Pizza Hut here in town is actually a pretty big building, but you can't eat inside it, which Jacob and I found to be odd.  That is until we found out that they got caught cooking meth inside the kitchen, and could no longer operate as an eat-in restaurant.    First of all, how a restaurant can get caught COOKING METH near food and still be open for business at all is beyond me.  Obviously it doesn't bother us, since we've eaten there three times since learning about the meth past, but it still seems like it shouldn't be allowed.  Second of all, wouldn't closing it to eat-in customers only encourage using it as a meth lab, since customers only have access to the very front of this large building?  You're basically giving them more room to cook the meth!  By the cash register, they have a framed copy of the Dickinson newspaper from many years ago, when the Pizza Hut opened there.  I'm not sure how they were able to land almost the ENTIRE front page of the newspaper with a headline that was something like "Pizza Hut Comes to Town!" but they did.  I pointed at it to the cashier and said "huh, I thought you guys had been in the paper more recently."  I was trying to be a smartass, referring to the meth bust, but he didn't hear me.  Buzzkill.  Also, I found it very suspicious that they had (I counted) 17 people working.  17!  What the heck are all those people doing?  Guarantee there is more meth being cooked there.

Today was homecoming at Dickinson State (yes, we have a university!), and they had this sign out by their athletic complex that said "Hawk the Plank!"  Dickinson State is the Bluehawks, so I'm guessing they were playing some sort of pirate-themed school?  I cannot even describe how much I love to say "Hawk the Plank."  I'm sure I've said it upwards of 35 times this week, and tonight while we were eating our meth pizza, I shook a piece at Jacob while saying "hawk the plank!"  I love it.  Also, it makes me appreciate my "We're gonna hawk block ur jimmies" shirt.  I'm guessing that was for a previous year's homecoming, and I am DESPERATE for one from this year.  By the time we leave this town, I want to have a t-shirt collection of hawk puns for the university.  It's a lofty goal, but I'll do everything I can to achieve it.  Even if it means going back to the thrift store repeatedly to fight the gremlins and find t-shirt treasures.

When I go to the grocery store, I am VERY efficient.  I've got a list, I know what my coupons are, and I know where everything I need is.  Unless there's some idiot blocking my way, I normally don't even stop my cart to get something; I push with my belly and grab what I need off the shelf without stopping.  Yesterday, while doing my shopping at Walmart, I got stalled in the meat section, looking for beef for stir fry, which I've never made.  I was standing there for a few minutes, looking around, and there was a lady standing beside me, also looking at meat.  She had a young daughter in her cart, who was very friendly.  She said hi to everyone that passed, waved to them, and would just say things like "My name's Chelsea!" or some sort of cutesy thing.  Now, I know most people would find that charming, but I was totally over it.  Don't distract me from finishing my grocery trip, and you really shouldn't talk to strangers.  Once I got the meat I needed, I put it in my cart and as I started to walk away, I heard "Mommy, who is that boy?"  Surely not.  SURELY she means someone else.  So I turn around and see the girl pointing at me as her mom whispers "oh honey, that's a lady."  WHAT IN THE WORLD?  It's like every child in the town is out to destroy my self-esteem.  Between the children screaming at my scary face, and this turd thinking I'm a boy, it's just not looking good for me.  I think when I have a child, I will just sing him or her to sleep each night with a song I made up.  "My mommy is a beautiful lady.  She's all woman and not scary.  Everyone else is jealous.  Because she's a girl."  The beat is a little bit tricky.  It's hard to convey over the internet.  But trust me, it's catchy and really, really sweet.  The perfect lullaby. 

Last night I made a recipe for Kung Pao Chicken, and I told Dana I would post the recipe, so here it is.  It was pretty good, and fairly easy.  The hardest thing for me was that I also made steamed rice and did some stir-fry veggies, so I had three burners going.  To me, that's like the equivalent of riding a unicycle while juggling with your eyes crossed.  Dangerous and nearly impossible.  If you're like Jacob and I, and you like Chinese food, but your town is too racist to have a Chinese restaurant, it's not a bad substitute.

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