The Unenthused Nomad: Snow's the Worst

Today was not a great day for me. I had my first winter breakdown when I was leaving work. Back story: it snowed a few inches over the weekend. Not a ton, but enough that the roads are all covered and icy, and the sides of the roads all have pretty deep drifts along the curb. At work, we don't have employee parking, so we have to park in the street. Normally it's not that bad and I can find a spot I can just pull up to on the curb (rather than parallel) and it's not a problem. Today, I pulled up to my normal section along the curb, and as I was pulling up, I wondered if the snow would be too deep. I tried to back up and pull out to test it, and it worked fine, so I pulled back along the curb and went on my merry way. Well as I was rushing to leave this afternoon--I had stayed almost an hour late and was worried the dogs were going to wet their kennels--I tried to pull my car out and found it was stuck in the accumulated snow. I can't even tell you the amount of frustration I could feel building inside me with each time I stepped on the gas. There was so much ice underneath the snow that even though my car was in drive, I kept sliding backwards. I couldn't get out of the rut I was stuck in to save my life. Every time I stepped on the gas, the car would shake side to side and then hit the curb. I didn't even know that was possible for the car to shake like that. It felt like King Kong was hovering above my car and shaking it every time I tried to drive away. After 20 minutes of very high blood pressure and whining to Jacob on the phone, I was finally able to weasel my way out and immediately broke down in illogical, heaving sighs. To make matters worse, my car was parked in the line of sight of my boss's window, so I'm sure she and the guy I work with were watching me laughing, wondering when I would give up and come in and ask to be pulled out of the snow. To which I say:

Anyway, I cried to Jacob the whole way home. It's the things like that that make me legitimately hate the snow. It's scary when your car is stuck and you have no control and your traction control light keeps coming on. It's scary when you slip on the ice walking down your front steps and feel like you're going to crack your head open on the cement. It's real reasons like that that make me want to punch everyone in the face when they say "oh I wish I lived somewhere it snowed." No. No you freaking don't.

Another example of why today was the pits is my dinner experience. I've been out of a lot of things for the last couple of days but since the roads have been bad, I've been putting off going to the store. Tonight for dinner I made a broccoli and chicken stir fry dish I've never done before. I'm going to be kind and say it tasted like vomit. I took one bite and gave up, but unfortunately we had no other food in the house for me too eat, so I ended up having half a peanut butter sandwich for dinner and half a glass of milk. I'm still super hungry, but I think the only thing left in the house is microwave popcorn, and since I ate an entire package of hot dogs over the weekend, I think I should probably not eat anymore salt for awhile.

Okay, on to important things--Oscar dresses. I didn't end up watching the show because I was totally over the whole thing (and bitter only a couple of the dresses I picked got worn). Anyways, here's my Top 5 Best and Worst Dressed. Enjoy.

Worst Dressed:
5. Rooney Mara--The thing that irritates me is that she could have worn ANY dress from ANY designer. And she went with a boring and poorly fitted Givenchy. Not nearly the best one in the collection. Frustrating.

4. Anna Faris--To be fair, I have no idea why she was there, but the whole thing is just...not great.

3. Viola Davis--Oh girl, I hate to do this, but it's true. I just did NOT like this dress. The top made me uncomfortable and I can't imagine she felt like she could move at all. Not to mention the bottom of the dress is....weird. When Sandra Bullock wore the red Vera Wang last year, it had the same top, and I remember thinking how uncomfortable it looked and how I was hoping it was taped down. And she didn't even have the boobs Viola has! I have no idea how Viola kept that thing up.

Here's Sandra from last year for comparison's sake:

2. Sandra Bullock--Come on, lady! This is disappointing. It looks like she bedazzled an old t-shirt and tucked it into a black skirt.

1. Jennifer Lopez--It's almost like it was a caricature of Jennifer Lopez, instead of the real woman. It's just waaaay too divalicious for the Oscars.

Best Dressed
5. Octavia Spencer--This dress looked so perfect on her. Brava.

4. Ellie Kemper--I can't get enough of this color. I could do without those bangs, but the dress, I LOVE.

3. Gwyneth Paltrow (sans cape)--Okay, here's the thing. I'm not a GOOP fan, and that cape actually made me LOL when I saw it. She's got a real pretentious and snotty attitude which grosses me out about her. To me, the cape looks like one of her housemaids just rested it on her shoulders while the driver is fetching the car (just finished season 1 of Downton Abbey). BUT, despite all that, when she took the cape off, I really loved that dress. Striking and simple and super chic.