Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Happy Anna Howard Shaw Day

Today I had some more issues in the work bathroom.  I think I've really learned my lesson about buying a Jimmy Johns sub in Bismarck and waiting until getting home in Dickinson (1.5 hours) to eat it.  That will MESS YOU UP.  Anyways, I'm still dealing with that whole thing and I happened to be in the bathroom at work for longer than I'm comfortable with saying.  The bathroom by my office only has two stalls, and I'm always really paranoid that someone is going to come in to the other stall at the worst possible moment.  Thankfully, today no one had to lose their lives by coming into the war zone while I was in there.  But I did get seriously burned by an unexpected new foe.  After several rounds of artillery fire, I was cooling my heels waiting for the next attack, when I heard a beep and a whooshing sound.  Turns out I had been in there so long, I had gone the entire length of the cycle for the automatic air freshener.  For being a completely impersonal, inanimate object, it was very humbling and total felt like some snobby Englishwoman had just walked and and said "Oh, it's quite dreadful in here!"
 I'm not sure if any of you have every been burned by an inanimate object before, but it hurt.  When I finally came out of the stall, I felt like I was looking at this face when I looked at that cocky little air freshener hanging from the wall.
Touche, air freshener.  You may have won this round, but we'll see who's laughing last when I come in tomorrow with a baseball bat.

Well I was able to run my three miles tonight, which felt good and I'm glad I did it.  Unfortunately, tonight saw the return of my male nemesis, Zac. For those who don't remember Zac, he's the Bill Hader look-alike with the square head, glandular problem, and flat feet who always makes me mad when we share the track.  Here's the thing with Zac--he's awkward and annoying and obviously extremely competitive because the second he sees anyone within half a lap of him, he sprints until he passes them, and as he passes you, he leaves you very little personal space.  That would be annoying enough, but I have to admit, his appearance plays a large part in my constant aggravation.  Tonight, for example, he was wearing basketball shorts that had to have been above his belly button because they stopped about four inches above his knees, with spandex underneath that stopped mid-kneecap.  He was also wearing black high tops that seemed to slap the floor with the force of a wrecking ball as his huge flat platypus feet smacked the floor with every step.  I was irritated with Zac from the very beginning because the track was packed with people walking after work, and Zac kept making it his mission to sprint past me and spook me.  Several times I was trying to pass a pack of walkers when out of NOWHERE I had to slam on the brakes because Zac was running right by me and would graze my shoulder.  I swear, I think he watches for when other runners are trying to just go around walkers and then sprints to cut them off so they either bump into him or have to completely stop.  I seriously hate this guy.  Once, as I was passing a couple large ladies (no offense, there just wasn't a lot of room left to go around) I'm trying to squeeze past, and Zac comes up and squeezes right on past us.  This track is NOT WIDE ENOUGH FOR 4 PEOPLE.  It just isn't.  Honestly, it's a tough to fit three wide on the track, so what he was thinking I have no idea.  So of course I bump into one of the ladies and Zac slimes me with all of the sweat from his arm.  That's when I had to give him a "geez dude!" because, come on.  Personal space, you idiot.

Well today I am without my human Valentine since Jacob's in Houston, which is a bummer, but it's been very nice getting my snuggle on with my two furry guys.  Since making myself a sandwich only took two minutes of my evening, I've had a lot of time to relax and enjoy myself.  After watching an episode of Dance Moms and doing Face Time with Ashley and her handsome boys, I've just been watching clips from my favorite Valentine's episodes.  To be honest, I find myself watching some of these clips at least once a week.  Enjoy!
Leave it to Liz Lemon to give some of the very best Valentine's Day moments ever:


Gotta include Parks & Rec.  

 Still in the mood for some Valentine's Day related laughs?  Watch the Anna Howard Shaw Day episode of 30 Rock.  It's my all time favorite episode and I watched it twice today (okay 3 times).  Hope everyone had a great, chocolatey, romantic Valentine's day! 

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