Nailed It.

I got a call from the HR lady today, saying that they wanted to offer me the job!  Hooray!  She rattled off a ton of information, so there's a good chance that I missed something important about the job, like you must dress in Amish clothing everyday or you can't wear shoes on Wednesday, but I was too excited to worry about any of that.  I have to take a drug test tomorrow (fingers crossed!) and then my new employee orientation is December 13, so I've still got some time to live it up.  So far the only people who know I got the job are Jacob and Dana (the inner circle, you might say), so I guess I should probably call my parents. 

As promised, as soon as I got off the phone, I drove straight to Herbergers and bought myself the purse.  $100 off, you really can't beat that.  In my excitement, I forgot about the streaks of mascara on my face (see earlier post), so I'm sure the girl that checked me out at Herbergers thought I was mourning something terrible, but it was just my snowflake eyes.  I managed to make it to the mall and back in less than 10 minutes, because I was on a mission. 

As you can see, I'm quite satisfied with the purchase.  I wonder why it took me so long to get a job, because I'm really professional and totally act like an adult...

Technological Difficulties

Today has not been a great day for me, electronically.  While I was running today, my ipod died.  When I say died, I don't mean the battery died and it's charging now and works fine.  I mean RIP ipod, thanks for the memories.  And if that doesn't make you feel crappy enough, Apple programs the thing to give you this icon:

 Thanks so much, Apple.  Like I needed the sad face with X's for eyes to communicate to me that I'm about to be out $150.  What would Steve GOBS have to say about that?

After I walked the dogs this afternoon, I decided I wanted to watch some streaming Netflix, but NATURALLY my instant queue was messed up.  So for the second day in a row, I spent 20 minutes on the phone with Netflix, trying to get the situation sorted out.  The girl was basically no help and told me that the technicians were working on my account, and they would try to get my instant queue fixed soon, but it might erase all the movies I have stored in there, so I'll probably have to add all those back in.  When I realized she had no clue, I just asked how long I should expect until it's working.  Her response, "it should be fixed by today."  What does that mean.  Fixed by today?  Is that even a phrase?  If it was fixed by today, it would be working currently, right?  Ugh.  Currently it's still not working, but it's still today, so I guess I just have to wait.  Not long after I got off the phone with Netflix, Tom called me and quickly told me that I sounded like an underwater robot, so he hung up.  When he called back and I was still robotic, we realized it was my phone, so I had to turn my phone off and call him back.  So I guess the girl at Netflix thought she was talking to Small Wonder that whole time.  

  

I was telling Tom my electronic woes and how everything was going wrong, and twice during the conversation my cell phone dropped the call.  Perfect.  Thanks, irony!  I called him back and he said that he had full bars, so he didn't know why we kept losing each other, and I again told him it was because I was having such bad luck today.  His response: "Good thing you don't have a pacemaker."

It has been snowing the entire day today.  Like, since I woke up, I have not seen it stop, which really sucks.  Oscar seems a bit clueless about the whole thing, and Andy really loves eating snowballs and licking the snow off of our neighbor's doormat.  The cold weather in general makes Oscar really crazy, which you can see here:

  

I took some pictures of what it looks like outside, but these were all taken at like 3 pm, so everything got way more covered in snow.  I just can't take pictures after 4pm since the sun goes down then.

You can see here where Oscar and I walked to the mailbox.

Don't we have such a beautiful view out our front windows?  I still have no idea what that giant garage is for and what those iron things are, but it's not pretty.

 Again, this is early in the day.  The grass is totally covered now.  Perfect for making snowballs for the dogs to eat.

Despite the snow, Oscar still begged for a walk, so I bundled up (five layers on top) and took him.  The first half was not so bad because the snow was blowing into our backs, and since I was so puffed up, I wasn't even very cold.  The second half, we were walking into the wind and snow and it seemed like every flurry was landing directly on my eyeballs.  As we got close to home, it started to burn so bad that I felt like my eyes were getting boiled.  Great Zeus and Athena, it was painful.  I kept saying to the dogs "Help!  Mom's gone blind!"  After about three minutes of rubbing my eyes, I realized it wasn't just the frozen snow drops pelting my eyeballs that was hurting, it was the water washing all of my mascara into my eyes.  I went into the bathroom to try to get the mascara out of my eyes and was startled at the look of myself.  It looked like I had been trapped inside a coal mine explosion.  I wiped my eyes for several minutes and got 99% of it off, and then realized I should take a picture to show you how gross, grey, and raccoony I was:

It's fine, we're all thinking it.  I need a nose job.  That's just what happens when you mix Czech and German with a drop of Jewish (allegedly).  But yeah, this picture doesn't really do it justice.  It was solid black from my lash line to my eyebrows, and extending down to  my nose.  I still have a grey streak down the right side of my face that got smeared almost out to my ear.  Should I be worried that Jacob didn't notice that when he came home?

Bonus

I decided that since that last post was basically worthless, I'd give you a collection of fun videos to watch.  If you're like me, and your Cyber Monday shopping high has worn off, you probably need it.  Enjoy!

Andy Bernard lifts my spirits every time.  It's why I named my dog after him.  Couldn't love the guy anymore.  Now combine Andy with The Muppet Movie.  Throw in a little Pig Latin.  GENIUS.

Another fictional character that I would like to believe is real is Tom Haverford.  Everything he does is perfect, but I especially love when he sings.

Another comedic genius, Karl Pilkington.  Let me just say that Karl's relationship advice at the 4:00 mark is EXACTLY Jacob's stance on our relationship.  Mostly just the first year of dating.  He has admitted to me that he basically did whatever he wanted, didn't worry about how often we talked (during the long distance part) and hoped it would work out well.  I've always said he's a hopeless romantic.

I just realized that all of those videos are guys that I love, which is strange since I regularly go to Tina Fey and Amy Poehler as pick-me-ups.  I'll throw one of those in here for bonus as well.  For those of you who don't watch Parks & Rec, obviously you're missing out.  In this clip, Leslie is covering for one of her fellow hunters who shoots her boss, and when the Park Ranger comes by to investigate the incident, he treats her like a dumb girl, which she has plenty to say about.  I plan on using each and every one of these excuses to Jacob at some point.

In other news, I've been having some communication problems with my doctor, my by-mail pharmacy, and my local pharmacy, and it's driving me crazy.  Between the three of them, it's like they are determined to force me off my birth control.  I only have two more days worth of pills, people.  FIGURE IT OUT.  I have never missed taking a pill by more than an hour, and the idea of missing it for potentially multiple days is FREAKING.ME.OUT.

Still No Word

Well today was pretty boring. I was really hoping for some news on the job, but alas I have nothing. Hopefully I will hear something tomorrow and it will be good news. At this point I don't even really care about the job I just want that purse... Just kidding.



Not really.

Shopping= Mood Booster

Well we are less than ONE WEEK away from the half marathon, and I'm getting pretty excited about it.  Not so much because I'm excited about the race, but I am super ready to be done with training.  Even though I had a great run Thanksgiving morning for the Turkey Trot 10k, when I ran today I felt serious pains in my legs.  The vice-grip on my left leg came back and I spent the entire four miles trying to shake off what felt like iron shackles around my shin.  Here's hoping that my runs the rest of the week go better and I don't feel like my leg is in a tourniquet during the run on Sunday.

Lately I've been consumed (semi-exaggeration) with finding a dress to wear for Jacob's office Christmas party.  Since all my nice dresses are in storage and I need something in two weeks, I needed to order something online.  I took advantage of the Cyber Monday sales, and I found a dress I really love, and only spent $49.  HI-YO!

Granted, I'm not a size 0 model with skinny arms, but I still think it will be cute.  If only I had set my cute green or red heels aside to wear with it for the party.  Oh well.  Black peep toes will have to do.

I was pretty successful in my online shopping today.  I managed to get several presents for Jacob, and one present for another individual who was a huge help in picking out the party dress.  I won't go into anymore detail than that since said individual is not good at waiting for presents and will probably want me to tell her what I bought.  Not gonna happen, friend.  Still, I've never been in such good shape for Christmas at this point.  Granted, I don't have much purchased, but I at least know what I'm going to get for most people, so that's a start. 

Poor little Oscie boy has still not gotten all of his winter coat in, and he gets so cold some days.  I decided to look for a dog sweater and found one that I LOVE, but they don't have it in an XL, which is what he would need.

Come on, Target, MAKE IT HAPPEN.  I can't even tell you how much Andy loves his toy dreidel, and I am confident that he would be crazy jealous of the swagger Oscar would have in this sweater.  I honestly don't think it's too much to ask.

This morning, when I was checking my email, I saw that I had one from Herbergers (yeah, I get daily emails) with a coupon for an additional 15%.  I considered this a sign from God that I would not only be getting the job at the hospital, but that I should also reward myself with that Fossil purse for doing so.  Unfortunately the rest of the day went by with no word about the job...bummer.  I'm really hoping to hear something tomorrow, since that will have been a week since they brought me in to eat lunch with them.  To be honest, I can't really wait much longer because that purse will be be gone, and I will be very annoyed.

Back Again. Whatever.

Well.  We're back.  I say that with little to no celebration, since I'm currently in the middle of a pity-party for myself about living here.  It will pass (in a couple of years), and I'll be fine, but for today, I'm kinda grumpy.  Jacob must have been feeling this way last night because he was just such a Debbie Downer.  Around 8pm, he was like "I'm sick of watching tv, let's do something."  I went through everything I could think of--"We could go to Applebee's and get half price appetizers!"  Jacob: "No."  "We could put a movie on Netflix and watch that!"  Jacob:  "No."  "I could put a Top Gear on and we could watch that!"  Jacob:  "No."  "We could play Scrabble or some other game together on the iPad!"  Jacob:  "No."  "We could hand wash all of our dishes, even the clean ones!"  Jacob: "No."  So as you can see, it wasn't really the funnest night for me.  We ended up watching an episode of Top Gear, even though Jacob had initially turned that down, and I popped a couple bags of popcorn.  The British humor combined with the buttery treat seemed to do the trick, as I saw him smile almost three times, so I guess that's good.  We were both pretty exhausted from the day of traveling, and ended up going to bed at 10pm.  It's totally fine if you're jealous of what sounds like the greatest Saturday night ever.  Unfortunately, once we were in bed, Jacob's irritation returned, and as I was reading, he was complaining about the clock in our kitchen that he could hear ticking.  I got up and took the battery out, only to have Jacob immediately complain about Andy's placement in our bed, because it was wrinkling the sheets.  He was also frustrated because Andy was curled up against him, which was making him warm.  I tried to adjust Andy so that we could straighten the sheets, but Andy decided he'd had enough of us, and got up out of the bed and left.  I don't think anyone will be surprised to hear that Jacob immediately complained about how cold he was without Andy's body heat.  I offered to turn the heat on, but he turned that down, I think just so he could continue to complain.  A bit later, he got up to go to the bathroom, and when he came back, all he said was "Man, I'm really grumpy."  I agreed, and he said "Sorry about that."

Yesterday, when we got back in town, I decided I wanted to see if Herbergers had any good sales still going.  I didn't get to do any Black Friday shopping since no one would take me (HUNTER), so I was really needing to scratch the shopping itch I had.  When I got to Herbergers, I realized that all their good deals were Friday only, which was a pretty big bummer, but I did stumble across a purse on clearance that I have had my eyes on for MONTHS. 

 

I had a coupon that took an additional 15% of the clearance price, and I told myself I needed to look for gifts for Jacob before I bought myself anything.  The minute I put it down, some hussy came over and picked it up and started looking at it.  At that moment, I was positive I'd made a huge mistake in putting it down.

I was so tempted to just walk over and take it out of her hands and tell her it's not the bag for her.  Honey, I think they make better bags to coordinate with your lilac Eeyore sweatshirt and seven year old Reebok's.  I know I sound judgemental, but guess what?  I DON'T CARE.  That purse was MEANT for me, dang it.  In the end, I hovered around her long enough to see that she dropped the Fossil bag for some disgusting monstrosity that was woven and had American flags on it.  After doing some shopping for Jacob, (and remembering that he'd already bought me a Coach purse for Christmas), I decided I shouldn't spend the money on the Fossil.  I have regretted that decision since the second I walked out that store.  I promise you this--if I get a call this week, saying I got that job at the hospital, the very first thing I'm doing is going to Herbergers and getting that purse.  The bummer is the 15% coupon won't be valid anymore, but it will still be worth it. 

Okay now that it's getting to be super cold, I am in desperate need of some good warm recipes.  I made chicken pot pie last week, and it was pretty good, but I need more.  More soups, more casseroles, anything that will be really warm and comforting.  This week I'm making a few baked pastas and shepherds pie, but I really don't want to make the same things all winter, because I get tired of stuff so quickly.  Suggestions???

Warning: if you don't want to read my tirade about a Pastor, then this paragraph probably isn't for you.  For the rest of you, let me just tell you how annoyed I was today during church.  Jacob and I both overslept this morning, so we couldn't go to the LCMS church, and would only be able to make it to the Bible church next door we go to most of the time.  Here's the deal with this place; we love the music, and the congregation seems really friendly and passionate, but neither Jacob nor I are crazy about either of the pastors.  You may recall several weeks ago, when the pastor made a comment about God creating the birds of the air, and then immediately making a hunting comment and me becoming enraged.  Today the other pastor gave the sermon, and as soon as I saw in the bulletin that he was the one preaching, I was a bit nervous.  This pastor tends to be a bit....verbose.  Now, that probably seems ironic coming from me, but this guy rambles unbelievably.  He will literally say the same thing 10 different times consecutively before moving on to his next point.  WE GET IT GUY, YOU'RE NOT SAYING ANYTHING NEW.  WRAP IT UP.  He also has an extremely annoying habit of telling WAY too many personal stories during the sermon.  Today he managed to incorporate about 12 stories about his daughters alone.  The problem with his stories is that as soon as he starts a story, he realizes he's got to tell like 10 others in order for his point to make sense, so every story splinters into a ton more, and he gives you so much useless knowledge.  For example, he rambled on like this for awhile: he gathered his family together on Friday evening to discuss how they would prepare for the Christmas holiday.  Did you know the word holiday means Holy Day?  Most of us don't treat them that way.  So anyway, he has his family gathered and his youngest daughter, who's 3, is the most talkative in their family.  Sometimes she just makes noises, because she's talking so fast.  She knows words, but she just can't keep up with her words sometimes when she's so excited.  And when you give her hot chocolate, it only gets worse!  But somehow, when they were discussing how to celebrate the Christmas season, and how they were going to slow down, even she was able to sit still and listen.  Now that's a Christmas miracle!  That was only a portion of the story he was telling.  Another obnoxious example of this is when he was telling some story, and he starts out by saying "Once, during a huge storm--I'm not one of those dads that goes by the rules.  During storms, I bring my kids outside to watch.  You can ask my wife, I'm always waking the kids up to bring them outside to see the storm.  Except one time during that terrible storm...where was it?  Anyway, the storm was so bad, and I told my wife 'get downstairs!' and she did, and I followed right behind her.  Normally, I'd be outside watching, but not this time.  And my oldest daughter, she was 4 at the time--actually, I remember before we had her.  My wife was with child-she does all the work, I just help in naming them!  I had bought a Bible for her.  You know, you're supposed to be able to tell the reading level based on the version of the Bible you buy.  I bought her New American Standard.  I guess I expected her to be reading at a young age!  That's actually about an 11th grade reading level.  She's not quite there yet.  No, really, she's a great reader now.  Loves to read.  She reads her Bible all the time.  So during this storm, we're downstairs, and she asks me if anyone lives in the town effected by the storm, and I said yes, so she asked to pray for those people.  Isn't that great?  Boy, does that humble you when you realize how good a job you're doing guiding and growing these children when a 4 year old thinks to pray for someone else in a time like that."  I mean, really.  How much of that information did we need to know to hear that at 4, your daughter thought to pray for someone else?  And, to be honest, I have no idea how it even applied to the sermon.  Another favorite trick of his is to spend 75% of the sermon, regardless of the topic, discussing how important it is for HIM PERSONALLY to be a good spiritual leader to his family.  He goes on and on about how he's a good example, and how his girls see that they need to look to the Bible for answers because that's what he does, and that, even though he's a workaholic, he can't bother to be away from his family.  Underneath all the bragging, he has a good point about how important it is for fathers to be spiritual leaders of a household and how families should be in the Word together.  I agree with all that, but it's the way he says it, like we should all be clapping through the sermon and giving him an "Amen" at the end of every sentence for how amazing he is as a father.  And to top it all off, after 20 STRAIGHT MINUTES of saying how awesome he is as a father and how good he is to his daughters, he said "I truly believe humility is one of the most important things."  I feel bad, but I actually laughed out loud.  I tried to cover it up with a cough, but I think the people around me knew.  To be honest, he lost me about 10 minutes into the sermon when he started bragging about how much time he spends with his daughters, because that's so important.  He even brought them out hunting with him because he couldn't bear to be away from them.  Then he spent about five minutes talking about how deer season was one of his favorite times of the year, but it's hard because he wants to be with his family, so he wishes the state of North Dakota would extend the season so he could get out there some more.  I'm tempted to paint my face and hide in the bushes outside the church playground and shoot his precious daughters with tranquilizers.  If he gets offended, I'll just tell him I like the challenge of it!  Clearly this guy is not my favorite, and since he pissed me off with the hunting comment, I sat stewing the rest of the sermon, growing more irritated with every story he told that was of no spiritual significance.  Unfortunately for me, the sermon lasted over an hour... 

Yippee!

Tomorrow morning we're headed to Bismarck to start the journey home, and I am SO EXCITED.  I am really really really looking forward to seeing my family and I can't believe I'm going to be seeing them so soon.  We'll be traveling all day tomorrow and we get in late that night, so I probably won't get to see anyone except for my brother, who's picking us up from the airport.  But that's okay, because I love sweet Huntie!

Today I had my 2nd interview/lunch with the people I met yesterday.  It went well, it was just completely not what I expected.  When the HR lady called to say they wanted me to come eat lunch with the whole department and meet everyone, I assumed I would basically get quizzed all during lunch and it would be just like the interview yesterday.  I was wrong.  It was just lunch.  I met the people in the department that weren't in the interview yesterday, and they were super nice (bonus-and dog people!), and I really liked everyone.  I kept waiting for the interview questions to come during lunch, but we just talked.  They talked about people in their office that I was clueless about, and they'd ask me questions about Texas and stuff, but that was really it.   All in all, it was actually a really enjoyable lunch.  They said they'd make a decision within the next week, so hopefully I'll know something soon.  I guess the only negative about lunch was that the cafeteria food was not the best.  I just had a sandwich because I was too scared to try the cream of asparagus soup, but it was still dicey.  I looked everywhere for the hospital bar, but just couldn't find one, which of course, was a let down.

Every time I watch that, it surprises me when Lucille is out of the shot, but you can hear her laughing.  Makes me laugh every single time.  Lucille Bluth is truly an inspiration.