You may notice this is my second post for the day. Why, you ask? Because I have to make my grocery list and go to the store, and I'm doing anything I can to blow that off. Of probably more importance, I'm supposed to be setting up appointments to meet with Pediatricians for little baby. And what have I been doing? Listening to music from Wicked and searching for funny RHONJ pictures. I think I'm having like the opposite effect of nesting right now. My house is messy and I'm in denial about things that need to get done. I'm also thinking about painting my nails. PRIORITIES PEOPLE.
Jacob was out of town for a bit this week. He left on Monday and came back last night, so you know what that means. Crafts. I finally finished the pillow I made to go with the glider.
That beautiful black silhouette you see is sweet Oscar. He wouldn't move when I was trying to take the picture. Anyways, you get the idea. It's just a cream pillow with a diamond texture to it. I'm really happy with how it turned out. And the project cost me like...$4? Something crazy cheap. Also, I decided to do a canvas with an "O" in buttons for Olivia's room. Quick aside, you guys. Joann Fabrics is like, the best. Thanks to Hannah, I'm currently obsessed with it. I always find the cutest fabric there. Do I know how to sew? No. Does that stop me from buying fabric anytime I go there? No. So I bought this pink patterned fabric there the other day to use as the background for the canvas.
The buttons were actually the most difficult part of the project. In more ways than one, I guess. I had a REALLY hard time lining up the buttons on the canvas so it looked like an O and the color was fairly well balanced. That's really not the best project for someone with borderline OCD to do. But what was really hard was FINDING the buttons. Do you know how difficult it is to buy a variety of green buttons?! Harder than you think. You can get some at Hobby Lobby, but they come in packages of like 3 and they're $2. That might not seem like much money, but when you need a ton of buttons, that adds up pretty quick. Anyway, I'm happy with how it looks. Like I told Dana, I wish I'd had the foresight to turn the canvas sideways and do her monogram rather than just the first letter of her first name, but oh well. Another thing I learned from this project (while putting the fabric on the canvas) is that dogs HATE the sound of staple guns.
Most of you have already seen these, but a couple of weeks ago, we had a friend take some maternity pictures for us. I have to say, I'm so glad she did it and I LOVE how they turned out. I'm definitely going to frame one of Jacob and I for the baby's room. This one is probably my favorite:
Well, specifically the one on the left is probably my favorite. Not so much the one on the right, since it looks like I've hatched some evil scheme and am working on luring Jacob into it unknowingly. At least, that's what I get out of it. If you want to see more, you can go to her blog. Thanks again, Tanya!
Last weekend was my baby shower!!! Hannah and her mom did an AWESOME job with it, and everything was amazing. We got so much good stuff for the baby, and I am already feeling very overwhelmed by the number of thank you notes I need to write. I've been writing a few each day, but it just takes me forever! I spend like 20 minutes on one and then I want to quit. I'm thinking I might just fill the next several in with a smiling stick figure that's saying "Me likey present" and be done with it. That's sincere enough, right? But really, everything was amazing and I'm so grateful to everyone that came and especially to Hannah and her mom for putting on such a great shower.
FYI, I make VERY expressive faces when I'm happy and/or excited, so.....you can see I very much enjoyed the shower.
Thanks again to everybody!
So I gave up on my ridiculously long hair. It was just getting to be too annoying. Plus it was breaking all of my hair things because it was getting heavy, so I chopped it off yesterday. I'm gonna be honest, I knew ahead of time that I'd hate whatever the lady did. And I was right. I went in with this picture, hoping to get longish layers that would be easy to work with.
I know she's an Olsen, but I really love her. Plus she's got like the greatest hair. So yeah, I knew I wasn't going to come out LOOKING like that, but what I got was...awful. I look like a dude.
On the plus side, Jacob's always saying he wants me to cut my hair short, so WISH GRANTED. For real, though, I'm back to looking like Jodie Foster in Freaky Friday, which isn't good for anybody.
Just a few quick thoughts on Sunday's episode.Honestly it was pretty boring though so I don't have much...
Reminder: Vito is disgusting
Joe Gorga talking about surfing is almost enough to make me barf my PB sandwich. He says "surfing makes me horny, looking like a big black condom"
Honestly, saying that is weird enough, but saying that and then cutting to him and his SISTER side by side in their wetsuits while they skate around is....not normal.
You guys, Chris talking about Jacqueline's body is actually pretty sweet. He doesn't normally come off as the super loving husband, so I think it's super adorable for him to say that he was looking forward to seeing her in a wetsuit. I love them so much.
The Gorgas and Guidices shouldn't be sharing an RV. This is way too incestuous. Between the Joes comparing penis sizes and Melissa pulling up Teresa's dress to smack her butt, things are getting WEIRD. Blurred or not, I don't EVER want to see Joe Gorga pull his pants down. And in front of his sister?!?! UGH. That's enough to make me freak out. And not a good freak out.
Joe Guidice seems like the MOST obnoxious drunk ever.
Okay Jacqueline crying because Teresa's ankle hurts is really sweet. If Teresa ever says she's not a good friend, she's a big stupid idiot.
How did they end up with such a feast when they all said there was no food left and all they could find at the store was chicken broth and buns?
Lauren is kind of overreacting to her brother's comments, but everyone in her family basically mocking her for having her feelings hurt is messed up. Caroline should at least shut up Chris and Albie. The girl feels like crap, just give her a break for a little bit, you know? Chris and Albie make fun of her, she gets upset and now she's the a-hole? Makes sense.
GEE CAROLINE, I WONDER WHY LAUREN FEELS LEFT OUT AND NOT GOOD ENOUGH?!?! Maybe because your family is constantly mocking her weight. Or maybe because her brothers purposely told her that Albie's girlfriend moved into their apartment over a walkie talkie just to annoy her. Or maybe because when her brothers pick on her, everyone laughs at them and tells her she's just over sensitive. Maybe that has something to do with if.
Poor baby Jacqueline. All she ever wanted was to know what was happening to her best friend which is the ULTIMATE betrayal in Teresa's eyes. I know Jacqueline is my favorite, but I honestly still don't see what she did wrong. I don't get how she can even talk to Teresa because she doesn't understand logic. "Don't cry, you should just ask me"
-- Teresa, what are you even talking about?!? Her asking you what was happening is what got y'all into this mess to begin with!!!!!
Okay well that's it. Like I said, this week was pretty boring. I'm a little mad at Bravo (you especially, Andy Cohen).
The teaser they ran for Sunday's episode was where Joe takes the "business" call that obviously has nothing to do with work where he calls Teresa the B-word. I WANTED TO SEE THAT. And now I have to wait until Sunday?! FALSE ADVERTISING! BAIT AND SWITCH!! I'm mad at you Bravo. I don't appreciate that.
Alright you guys, it's about to get all mushy up in here, so if you don't want to read me bragging about how great Jacob is, best move on.
So today is Jacob and my 4 year wedding anniversary.
When I think about how nervous I was that day, it still makes me want to vomit. Not that I was nervous to marry him, but the idea of walking down the aisle, saying my vows in front of everyone, and generally being the center of attention all day makes my stomach church.
Over the past four years, things have changed, seemingly month to month with us. We've lived in Ohio, North Dakota and now back in the great state of Texas. We've had 3 houses, 6 apartments, 4 cars, 2 dogs, and a baby on the way. Things change constantly with us (although hopefully that's slowing down now!), but I love Jacob and feel closer to him everyday. For our wedding, my friend Joy sang this song:
I can't explain the cheesy imagery in the video, so sorry about that. But really, I love that song and I still think it was the perfect song to sing for our wedding. Is Jacob perfect? Definitely not. Does he sometimes drive me completely bonkers? Absolutely. But I couldn't imagine not being married to him. He makes me happy every single day, even when he drives me nuts. I get so excited every afternoon when I know he'll be home soon.
And when he walks in the door, I'm like one of the dogs, excited and giddy he's home, following him around the whole house.
I can't imagine anyone else who could make me laugh like he does.
So thanks, Jacob, for being a pretty awesome husband. Even though you can stress me out more than any other person on the planet, I love you and I can't wait till our daughter sees how baller we are.
I have been a busy little bee since Jacob's been gone. At least as far as crafts go. Housework....ehhh not so much. So I finished the set of paintings for the baby's room-they're the three striped pictures with animal silhouettes. The other is just a canvas I'm going to put somewhere in her room. I cut out a bunch (probably like 250) of circles out of paint samples I hoarded from Home Depot and glued them on in rows, staggering them to look like scallops. I'm happy with how it turned out, mostly because it was a SUPER cheap and really easy project. And it was fast. I did the whole thing while watching Crazy, Stupid Love. So yeah, I guess I'm at a standstill with my projects for now. Though there's no telling what I'll come up with in the next two days while waiting for Jacob to come home. I think sometime next week, my mom and I are going to have a sewing day, so I'll get to make the pillow to go with my glider, and we can get started on the curtains for the baby's room, which I am REALLY excited about. One thing is for sure, I need to stay away from any sort of craft store. I've recently developed an obsession for fabric, which has led to two Hobby Lobby trips and one Joann trip THIS WEEK. I don't even know what to do with all the fabric, but it takes all my will power to not be like "I'll take six yards" every time I see a fabric I like. Which is very often. Perhaps Hannah needs to teach me how to quilt, so I can make excuses about regularly needing to buy multiple fabrics of varying prints.
This week so far is looking a little dull. Jacob is out of town for training in Denver, so the boys and I are home alone. I'm just ready for him to be back. I like having the tv all to myself when he travels, but I just miss him a lot when he's gone. So far I've been keeping myself somewhat occupied with crafts. I'm FINALLY working on the paintings for little ladybug's room, but I haven't made it very far. I was actually thinking I might get really ambitious and try to surprise Jacob when he came home from Denver by having the nursery painted, but I don't think that's going to happen. I'd like to put beadboard up
and that's not really a project I can tackle myself. Plus, if we do the beadboard, only half of the wall would need to be painted, so it's not really worth me painting the whole nursery if it's just going to get covered up with paneling. So...I guess that project will have to wait for a weekend when Jacob and I can do it together. Actually the picture I found there is a lot like what I'm hoping for since I'd like to paint the room green.
I'm also hoping for a sewing day/night with my mom sometime this week (if I can ever find out where to buy Bernina replacement needles) so I can make the curtains for the nursery. I always tell myself I'm going to be so productive when Jacob goes out of town so I can really impress him when he gets back, but normally the only thing I accomplish is basically emptying my DVR.
Let me clear up something that might be a misunderstanding. I saw that someone found my blog by googling "got my first period at Schlitterbahn". Let's be clear about something. I didn't get my first period at Schlitterbahn--I got it during rehearsal for the Spring Musical in 6th grade. Nothing's more of a downer when you feel like you're a hot shot in an Americana skit like feeling like you've fallen into "Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret." So yeah....that was awful. And come to think of it, I was also wearing borrowed shoes from my friend Nina at the time, which doesn't have anything to do with my period, but does freak me out. That seems very unlike me to borrow someone's shoes, especially wearing them without socks. Blech. So if someone out there got HER first period at Schlitterbahn...yikes. Condolences. I've only been there once in my life, and naturally I got my period when I was there. I think that was my first summer of dating Jacob and I went with his whole family, and wound up with crazy cramps and bloating. (Unfortunately for them, this wouldn't be the worst period experience we shared as a group) My apologies to you, dear friend. I can't imagine dealing with that first period when you're in a bathing suit. I had a blue sequined skirt to hide behind.
Well I guess that's all the really pressing things happening in my life right now. I'm hoping to get some pictures of the house in the next few days to show you guys. We officially have ZERO boxes left in the house, which is pretty awesome. I'm ready to get some pictures hung so it starts to feel even more like home. So far, though, I'm really happy with the house.
So let's get into the important things, okay. Real Housewives of New Jersey. I still am missing a few episodes, but I was able to watch the new episode this Sunday when they go RV-ing in Napa. It wasn't a super drama-filled episode, but there were some highlights for us to discuss:
Watching everyone pack in the beginning just made me roll my eyes. HOWEVER, when Melissa is trying to pack for camping and says it could be "Camp Beverly Hills", my head nearly exploded. Was that a Troop Beverly Hills reference from Melissa?!?!?! Because if so, she just earned 25 million cool points in my book. For those of you who don't know, Troop Beverly Hills is Shelley Long's greatest career accomplishment (except maybe the Brady Bunch Movie). It's a movie that parodies Girl Scout troops and it's AMAZING.
I swear, when my daughter is old enough, she'll be getting this on dvd for her birthday. And if she's anything like me, she'll have all the lines memorized by age 12. I currently still remember them. I like to think of it as an exercise in preventing Alzheimer's.
This whole scene with Albie and Chris and Greg asking Albie's girlfriend to move in with them is so uncomfortable. The good news is that if (when) they breakup, they'll always have that special awkward moment to look back on and be like "yeahhhhh that should've been a sign we weren't meant to be together." She doesn't look that excited about the whole thing, but how's she going to say no? The whole thing just totally weirded me out. Also, her eyebrows are a bit severe to me. Just my two cents.
I could go either way on Chris and Albie's roommate, Greg, but I'll tell you who I LOVE--his dog, Deloris. You guys, I read that his dog is named after Whoopi Goldberg's character, Deloris Van Cartier (aka Sister Mary Clarence) from Sister Act. I CAN'T EMPHASIZE HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS. You know, people want to hate on the gays, but this? This is genius. Greg just earned A LOT of respect from me. More than I might be able to quantify.
As I was watching the episode, I was wondering why Greg was tagging along on this family adventure with the Manzos, but now that I love him so much because of his dog, I don't blame them for bringing him. I'd never want to let a mind like that away from me, either.
Had I known that this whole group had been diverted to Houston because of Hurricane Irene, I would've planted myself at IAH and refused to move until I met them. Sure, security might think I'm a terrorist for my crazy behavior, but what they SHOULD be concerned about is Teresa's hairline.
That's much more of a threat to our nation's security, in my opinion.
I can't tell you how crazy I'm going watching them doing all this shopping at Camping World. What do they plan on doing with all this stuff they're buying five days from now when they don't need it? You're not going to be able to carry all that stuff on the plane!! The more crap they put in their carts, the more angry I get. THIS IS SUCH A WASTE OF MONEY. There are MULTIPLE couples here in financial difficulty. Yet, here they are, spending $5000 on camping gear they'll probably throw away later in the week. They have like 12 carts worth of stuff they're buying. I think that's a bit much, right?!?!
When they pull into the RV park, Teresa is freaking out about it being a "parking lot". I hope the camera catches the look on her face when she finds out what the dump station is for....
Melissa and Teresa grabbing each other's boobs is...so weird. It'd be strange if they were really close. It's stranger knowing they sometimes hates each other. I love my sister-in-laws, I really do. But if any of them ever grabbed my boobs...God help them.
I'm going to bring this up once, and then I don't ever want to discuss it again because it makes me so queasy. Listening to Rich and Kathy talk about their sex life is bad enough, but having to see his blurred out erection makes me want to barf. I seem to recall Rich telling his kids not to invite their friends over for a pool party because Teresa was going to be there and he didn't want his kids to get embarrassed in front of their friends. But seeing their dad walking around with a boner on national tv, that's not embarrassing, right?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! Ugh, that is so nasty. I am so humiliated for their children.
Poor Kathy is bragging to Jacqueline and Caroline about having a conversation with Teresa and how it went well. She obviously doesn't realize Teresa was looking to start a fight over the whole "my mother's recipes" comment. That whole thing is just one more example of how Teresa can get mad at people but they're never allowed to hold her to the same standards. She's mad at Kathy for saying some recipes were actually her mom's, which Teresa thinks is a dig.
But when she went to Kathy's dessert tasting, she made a tacky comment:
To me, that seems pretty passive aggressive and hypocritical, but I'm sure if they bring it up at the reunion, she'll just pull her normal "It was a joke! Funny! Ha-ha!" Every time she says that defending something she's done, I want to claw at her face.
This whole recipe thing is such a stupid argument, anyways. I'm not sure why she thinks that because her mom made something, her mom copyrighted the recipe. Either way, YOU didn't come up with it. So what difference does it make when you're going to put it in your book and profit from it either way?
So I've been meaning to write a real post lately, but seeing as Dana is out of town right now and I'm super exhausted, it just hasn't happened. We moved into our new house last Friday (HUZZAH!) and have been going nonstop (or so it feels to my sore feet).
Since I'm too tired to write about anything important, I'll just give you some snippets of what I've been thinking about.
I've been sitting in the recliner a lot over the past few days because it makes my swollen feet feel way better. I'm not sure what it is about that chair, but the second I sit in it, the baby goes crazy. She's always gettin her Bill Cosby on in that chair because my stomach goes full-on Jello Jiggler. It's pretty wild. Also probably kind if gross to look at.
I'd like to apologize to my fellow HEB shopper who was shopping in the pasta aisle with me the other day. I promise, if I had known you were there, I would not have been singing Mariah Carey's "Honey" aloud. My sincere apologies. Also, "Honey" was not playing in the store, so I have no idea why I was singing it since its not 1999.
Andy and Oscar have already become quite accustomed to their new backyard. When I get up in the morning and let them out, they both ignore my instructions to potty and just immediately throw themselves down in the grass to sunbathe. They lie there, faces towards the sun like lions, getting vitamin D. I really think it might be lightening Oscar's fur because I was noticing today that he's become much more brown lately.
My sugar cravings have not gone away. I am constantly thinking about how amazing a snowcone and a doozie from American Cookie Company would be. I'm thinking that may be what I request for my birthday meal. I'll just follow it up with some insulin.
This Friday is Jacob's flex day, which means he will be home all day. Anyone want to estimate how many hours of cleaning will be done? I expect he will start on chores around 7 am and I don't think he will stop until dinner time. I won't say I'm necessarily excited about it.
Some nights when I'm taking my shower, I think of this super depressing story my mom told me once about some friends of hers. The wife was prone to seizures and the husband made her promise to never shower while he was gone in case something happened to her. Well one night she was tired and decided to take a quick shower before he got home. Yada yada yada, she died and it bums me out. She also told me a similar story about a couple who went golfing and the wife got hit by a golf ball to the head. She died too. I pretty much think of that whenever I drive by a golf course. Which blows since we have a golf course in the neighborhood. So if you're ever in need of a good cry, my mom reads the obituaries everyday and I'm pretty sure she could fill a Rolodex with sad stories.
In the last week, I have watched all of season 4 of Breaking Bad. If you're looking for a show to get into and you like (sometimes intense) dramas, I highly recommend it. And if you tell me you'll watch it but haven't had the time, and I find out you're still watching reruns of The Closer (ahem, Tom), I swear I'll cut you out of my life.
Welp. Guess that's about it. Like I said, I would REALLY like to get a real post in one of these days, it's just been busy busy here lately. In the meantime, I'll leave you with this picture of Andy, guarding the house from a comfortable spot in the game room. It's hard being a guard dog.
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